Monday, February 24, 2014

I threw it out

The first thing I did after Primo's lawyer called to let me know that TPR had been granted was...

Well, before that I let my husband and children know.

Then I had a good cry.

Finally, I felt the need for a concrete action that would represent the end to all of the visits I've taken Primo to.

My eyes settled on the 2.5 year old diaper bag that I have packed and carried to all of Primo's visits.

I threw it in the trash and that felt good.

Thursday, February 20, 2014

It's done

Primo and all of his brothers are now legally free for adoption. TPR was granted by the judge.

I'm mostly feeling relief, but also feeling very sad for Primo's parents.

Now we wait for 30 some days to see if there will be an appeal. DH$ also has 30 days to transfer Primo's case to adoptions.

Saturday, February 15, 2014

I left the house yesterday without brushing my hair, and I didn't realize it until well into the day. A day of appointments and meetings.

As Primo's court date approaches I find myself drifting into malaise. I don't think I can take another phone call like the one I received last summer to let me know that absolutely nothing was accomplished in court and Primo and his 3 brothers would be in foster care for another 6 months.

I so want to be hopeful about the TPR trial, but I'm reliving last summer and wondering if these children will ever be free from foster care.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Update: Primo's hair and skin care

Back in 2012 I wrote about Primo's hair and skin care. Parenting an African American child was new to me and it took me a while to find the products I needed to keep Primo's skin and hair happy and healthy.

Since then I've changed things up a bit so I thought I'd write again about what products work well for Primo now that he's a toddler.

The main reason for the changes to our hair and skin care routine was that I was concerned about the fact that I was spreading lotions on Primo's skin every day that contained many ingredients that I couldn't pronounce and had very little notion of how they may effect him long term.  I was increasingly uncomfortable with the fact that Primo was soaking up a bunch of unnatural stuff, and the skin being the largest organ and all, I decided to research some all natural or gentler lotions and moisturizers.

This is what I've come up with for now. As always if you have any recommendations I would LOVE to hear what works for you.

I'm in love with this product:
You can find here at Truly Pure and Natural, (and this is their photo too) I use this every day on Primo's skin. It's light, fluffy and smells like heaven. I also use Truly Pure and Natural's shampoo and their amazing conditioner, which can be used as a moisturizer too. I know I couldn't believe it either, but it's great for when I need a lighter moisturizer for Primo during the summer months.  I order these three products online, click link above.

I also like Shea Moisture's Raw Shea and Chamomile & Aragan BABY Head-to-toe ointment for when Primo needs a heavy duty moisturizer/oil for his skin or has scrapes that may scar. I can pick this up at Target and a little goes a long way, so it lasts forever.

                                          Photo credit: Target

I also still use plain old coconut oil on Primo's wet hair after a bath to seal in the moisture from the bath. I'm finally coming to the end of the container I bought in 2012!

                                                         Photo credit: Whole Foods

I like Shea Moisture's Curl Enhancing Smoothie for Primo's hair every day. It doesn't have the over powering smell that some of the other hair products I've tried seem to have. I pick this up at Target, and the large tub I have is lasting a long time, so it is well worth the $12.

                                           Photo credit: Target

Monday, February 10, 2014


Some where out there in the world of foster care blogs some one came up with the idea of announcing how many days their foster children had been in foster care.

Primo is 896 #daysinfostercare. Hopefully this month his case will move forward towards adoption. His TPR date is coming up this month.